How are Pattaya’s expats coping with advancing years? Here are some thoughts on the matter.
– I didn’t go to the gym today. That makes five years in a row.
– I changed my car horn to gunshot sounds. People get out of the way quickly now.
– You know that tingly feeling when you really like somebody? That’s common sense deserting you.
– I decided to change calling the bathroom The John and renamed it The Jim. I feel so much better saying I went to the Jim this morning.
– I don’t need anger management. I need people to stop irritating me.
– Old age really is coming at a bad time!
– When I was a child I thought Nap Time was a punishment. Now it feels like a small vacation.
– The biggest lie I tell myself is that I don’t need to write it down to remember it.
– My people skills are just fine. It’s my tolerance of idiots that needs working on.
– If God had wanted me to touch my toes, he would have put them higher up.
– I’m going to retire and live off my savings. Not sure what I’ll do in the second week.
– I’ve lost my mind and I’m pretty sure my wife took it.
– Even duct tape can’t fix stupid, but it can muffle the sound.
– Why do I have to “press one for English” when you’ll just speak to someone you can’t understand anyway?
– Of course, I talk to myself. I need expert advice.
– I have joined a support group for procrastinators, but we haven’t fixed up a meeting yet.