Look away if you don’t like pastels
Unicorn Island is an inflatable obstacle course on the water, which brings monkey vines and trampolines to the beach at Subic Bay, on the west coast of the Philippines.
And although the unicorn trend may be on its way out (apparently alpacas are way more 2018), all the Millennial pastels mean this park is still good for the ‘gram.
This kitsch attraction is actually an extension of a larger theme park, Inflatable Island, which opened in April last year.
The park is fitted with slides, bridges, and various unicorn-themed hurdles – all with cutesy names like Baba’s Super Slide and Climby the Seaunicorn. And the unicorn-decorated section of Inflatable Island stretches across almost 6,400 square feet – that’s more than two tennis courts worth of rainbow joy.
If all those pastels make you feel a bit funny, then you can chill out on beanbags on the beach – although they, too, are pink and purple.
So, if you thought people had had enough of unicorn inflatables after buying and then bursting them all of last summer, you were wrong.
OMG the weather
So much pink
For those who want something even quirkier than a unicorn park, here are a few more options from around the world…
Bonbon Land, Denmark
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Vores skildpadde har fået en sygemelding indtil midt i næste uge. Men bare rolig Den Skøre Skildpadde skal blot have skiftet en enkelt del. Hun er i gode hænder 😊 #bonbonland #skideskægt #dedanskesydhavskyster #denmark #summer #sommer #skildpadde #denskøreskildpadde #turtel #danmark #sharedenmark #mitdanmark #sommeridanmark #rides #forlystelsesparker #sjovidanmark #sjovt #fun #bluesky
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Kudos to the Danes for taking a theme park based on a brand of sweets and turning it into something truly odd. To be fair, the sweets themselves had rude names, like Store Babser (translated as ‘big boobies’) and Hundeprutter (‘dog farts’).
The rides in Bonbon Land are similarly wacky: there’s the Crazy Turtle (pictured above) and The Horse Dropping. Stick to the bodily-function theme, its most famous ride is the Dog Fart Roller Coaster, which involves a spin around mounds of giant poo while flatulent sounds parp on loudspeakers.
Soviet Bunker, Lithuania
If you like your theme park thrills with a more hardline Soviet vibe, then this USSR-tribute option just outside Vilnius could be for you.
The bunker – referred to as an Underground Museum of Socialism – is located five meters below ground, and offers visitors what it calls a three-hour “1984 Survival Drama”.
When you get to the bunker, you’ll be met by guards with dogs, made to hand over your belongings and wear a Soviet-era coat to recreate something of what life was like in the former USSR.
It involves navigating a maze, going through a KGB interrogation, and learning to apply a gas mask. You’ll also see makeshift ‘Lenin propaganda rooms’, Soviet doctor’s rooms, and schools.
There’s also a chance to dance to era-specific music, eat a classic Soviet dinner yourself, watch TV shows and peruse shops from 1984.
Love Land, South Korea
If Erotikaland wasn’t enough to scratch your sexualised theme park itch, then you could do worse than make your way to this spot on the South Korean island of Jeju.
Opened in 2004, Love Land actually exists for quite a sweet reason: to help to educate inexperienced newlyweds about the pleasures of the flesh.
It specialises in erotic outdoor sculptures and a celebration of all things carnal, with 140 sculptures depicting humans in various sexual positions, as well as oversized phallus statues and stone labia.
It also runs sex education films and features interactive exhibits, such as the intriguingly titled ‘self-pleasuring bicycle’.
Wunderland Kalkar, Germany
Finally, not many theme parks can claim to be within an actual nuclear power plant. This site at Kalkar in Germany never went into operation, and so instead became a leisure site. They even repurposed that enormous nuclear cooling tower to be a 58-meter high ‘Vertical Swing’.
Inflata Nation, Manchester
If you’d rather something closer to home, the UK’s first permanent inflatable theme park opened in Manchester last year – and it’s not only adult-friendly, it’s available for adult-only sessions.
The theme park’s features include an inflatable climbing wall, two-lane assault course, Gladiators-style duel platform, a huge slide down into a ball pool, and two other drop slides.
So if this sudden burst of sunshine has made you dream of alfresco fun, you have nuclear power plants, unicorns and sex bicycles to choose from, you lucky thing.